Why do women compare themselves in certain ways?

Todd Wilson, in Lies Homeschooling Moms Believe, asks why women compare children, houses, and spirituality.  Here are my thoughts.

God designed women to be the raisers of children and the keepers of homes.  At the same time, they all desire to be godly.  Therefore, women draw their identities from children, homes, and godliness.  They perceive the children, homes, and godliness of other women to be a certain way.  Then, if they are not at least as good as these perceptions, they feel as if they have no worth.  The problem is, they cannot see behind the closed doors of these other women.  The only comparison that women need to make is to the word of God.  Are you keeping your home and training your children in godliness?  Are you more holy now than you were before?  Then you are on the right track.

I think another reason that women compare children, homes, and godliness is that they have spent too many hours dwelling on Proverbs 31.  Please do not get the impression that I think women should not strive to meet the qualities of the Proverbs 31 woman.  However, dwelling on it to the point that other passages of Scripture are neglected is unhealthy.  Women should take in the full counsel of God’s Word.  Also, women need to remember that this is a DESCRIPTION of a woman.  It is not a COMMANDMENT.  Keeping a home and raising children will look different for every woman and will  even vary according seasons of life.  Should I invest heaps of money that I do not have in wool and flax and take up spinning and weaving (Prov. 31:13a)?  No.  Should I willing work with my hands (Prov. 31:13b)?  Of course.   But just because I do not have a field or a vineyard does not mean that I am not being a keeper at home.

Ladies, let us stop comparing ourselves to one another and take in the full counsel of God’s word.


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